Riobomba Revisited

This is lovely and has potential,but on a technical level needs a lot of work. I've made in depth critique below and hope you find it helpful. I notice your main weak point is run on sentences and sentence structure in general, but there are also spag issues. The content is sweet and endearing, and there are a few lovely, poetic phrases gracing this tender write.

DETAILED NOTES---
**if you push aside the reeds with either hand,you will see a grove of
eucalyptus tossing in the wind. (Add space after comma)

**Nestled there is a home, a shack to many, where a family with smiles on
their faces,(no ,) lives within.

(I recommend to delete "within", because "where" already implies this)

**Poor beyond standards, they met me one day at their doorway, barefoot
and with dust on their tanned feet while their tender souls displayed
and shown like gold.

The first clause would work better as separate sentence and this sentence is borderline run-on as well. You only need one verb---so choose either displayed or shone (not spelled shown).

Suggestion-- trim and tighten, and work on sentence structure.

They met me one day at their doorway with dusty, tanned bare feet. They were poor beyond standards, but their tender souls shone like gold.

I was amazed and humbled by their inward wealth as God's glory rang
throughout their house, bouncing off the dirt floors, whistling through
the timbers. (NICE---)

**I perked up when I saw their daughter, a beauty like no other, coming
from the river, passing row upon row of shadows, carrying her load of
pots and pans. ---CARREFUL of COMMA CLUTTER! This is a run on sentence.

Maybe try making it two sentences?

I perked up when I saw their daughter, a beauty like no other, coming
from the river. Carrying her load of pots and pans, she passed row upon row of shadows.

***Now, she wore a blanket of muted jade, which graced her body. WORDY! Try to tighten. Graced her body implies she wore it, so you need not tell us twice.

not sure why the word NOW was preceding this observation? This implies she was not wearing the blanket before?

Editing example--
A blanket of muted jade graced her body.

**The shape of her legs supported this beauty as I noticed the highlights
of her skin as she walked into the room.

This sentence is weak and disconnected. Maybe simplify it? "I noticed her shapely legs and the highlights of her skin..."

**Vivid with punch, and muted by finesse was her skin, having been
drenched from the sun just enough, as her blush filled the room with a
warm glow. The same as rose petals mixed with the oil of lavender.

RUN ON! Spag issues! While this has poetic flavor, it needs honing in terms of sentence structure and delivery. The above needs revision badly. Let me know if you wish more detailed suggestions. :) This applies to next paragraph as well! Careful of wordiness and try to avoid unnecessary filler words, ensuring every word to count and contribute.


Water overflowing a rainbow gave life and color to her lips, quivering
the adobe around my feet, and a straight back supported proud breasts,
which pointed at me. Clay has been used by 'The Master Artist,' to build
this work of art which stood before me.

**
Eyes light blue, favoring turquoise and bright with light, glanced my
way.

A bit choppy---consider condensing.

For example-

Bright blue eyes, favoring turquoise, glanced my way.

**Her words and actions,(no ,) I remember to this day.

Lovely line--
What keeps me going is her smile, which I see each time I breathe.

So, if you should see this woman with such a kind soul, wearing an
invisible string, please tell her, (no line break)

"We have a dance,(no ,) which we never quite finished,(...)" (Delete "AND')and (If)if it is God's will, I will find my way back to this beauty(.) as (delete 'as') I put this note in a bottle,(no ,) and place it in the ocean of life, overflowing into

This is a nice phrase---captures the feeling with brevity and style-

Without warning, a rumbling in the earth produced a flood that picked me
up and carried me to another valley.